...in which it's really been 52 weeks.
On May 17, 2010 I decided I was too fat. Too fat again. How did this happen? I blame beer and fudgesicles. Totally all their fault.
I wasn't necessarily unhappy like so many people on fatty reality shows are. I wasn't fat because I was sad, or because I had a rough childhood or because I was scared of who I really was when I wasn't fat. I knew who I was. I was funny, outgoing, smart and pretty damn clever too. Also I swore WAY too much and had substantial burping problems. I still am (and have) all those things, just in a smaller package. I've LITERALLY (yeah, I did that) been working my ass off and it does look fabulous. I'm pretty much forcing everyone to look at it whether they want to or not.
Even though I love Biggest Loser, weight loss is not a journey. I HATE that they call it that, it makes it sound like we should be sad and weepy all the time. Like Odysseus. Oh, did we not read the same copy of The Odyssey? No wonder I hated it so much. It's been hard crappy work that forced me to give up a lot of things I really like. Like my friends and booze. I've just recently started drinking again; many weekends of excess and I think I need to put libations on the back burner for a while. At least till I go to Alaska. But losing weight SUCKS. I'm sweaty all the time, my car smells like a foot because I'm always either on my way to the gym or on my way home from there. And I can't wait till I don't have to count calories anymore, it's SO boring. I don't CARE how many calories are in my Hungarian goulash I just want to enjoy it!
But there's a plus side to all this of course. I love to complain, but you can't argue with results. I can do more at the gym than I ever thought I could (even though I bitch and swear a LOT) and it's totally worth it. I went to the Rogue brewery in Newport last weekend and my three beers, fries and meat did not sit well- my body was definitely rejecting my decisions. I felt like shit that night (totally worth it though GOD I love beer) but it was good to know in real life I'm making the right decisions and my insides are super happy (most of the time). Also, I know a lot of people aren't sure if it's kosher to compliment someone on losing weight, to mention it might be admitting that you thought they were fat before. But guess what. I was fat before. I know I was fat. And I want EVERYONE to notice how good I look and tell me. PLEASE tell me! We all strive for validation and adoration cause it feels good to be appreciated when working so hard to reach a goal.
Also, you can tell me I'm funny too. Because compliments are awesome and looks aren't everything. It's okay to be shallow sometimes, but c'mon. Grow up will you?
PS- Weight? 178. That's 38 total pounds gone (even with a 4 month break over vacations and the holidays!). I've lost just about 15 inches from everywhere on my body. That's science. I've gone from a size 16 to a 10 and an iffy XL to an M. That's math. Shopping is fun now and I love everything just a little more than I did before. Being a skinny bitch is awesome.
1 comment:
You look GREAT!!!
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