Week five!

2/15 - 2/21

I've gotten really good at counting calories, but I'm still having problems making those calories count. Whoa! See what I just did there? Came up with that as I was typing. Skinny must bring out the genius in me.

Even though I'm putting all my food into my calorie counter app, I still haven't mastered the beauty (or math) of it all. When there's good TV on (and as I've discussed, this happens all too often) I can't help but stay on the elliptical for an hour or more (why oh why are you SO good Jersey Shore?!). My "personal trainer" (I use quotes because he takes the time to tell me what I'm doing wrong every now and then even though I can't pay him money to do it regularly) tells me I should only be working out 35 to 40 minutes a day. When I work out too long, I burn too many calories and my body goes into some kind of... cortisol... something. I don't know, he speaks a lot of science talk and I zone out.

Also, when I burn those 700 calories I'm supposed to be making them up over the course of the day by eating more. And that's where my problem lies. I drank too much last week (and for me, that means 2 days in a row) I ate pizza for breakfast too often, and I made delicious, delicious chicken salad for lunches. Yes, it's made with vegan mayo, but that shit isn't healthy, it just doesn't have eggs in it.

So I'm still around 1600 calories a day, plus my workouts, but it's not enough. There's too much sugar (story of my life) and not enough fiber. There's plenty of protein, but that's because I've been mainlining homemade trail mix for days and putting peanut butter on everything.

When I get on the scale Monday morning, I really want to be out of the 190s. Last time I lost weight I made it down to 194 and then started packing on the pounds again. I want to be in the 180s so I know this is for real and I know I can keep going.

0.6 pounds down and now I weigh 190.3. Yes, it's a loss, but in my head it's not enough. In my disappointment about not hitting that really important goal, I miss the fact that I've officially lost 25 pounds since I started last May. 20 of it was last year, and six of it in the last five weeks. And in the long run that's not too bad. If I keep going, in 20 weeks I'll be at my goal. And if I don't, in 20 weeks I'll be right here still. Not that I'm going to quit, it's just nice to have a little perspective.

(Also, yay for my gym buddy who lost 2.2 pounds in week five and is officially in the mid-180s AND has lost 30 pounds since we started! Couldn't be more pleased for her success.)