Only it's actually the opposite of the quote. Does that make sense? No? Too bad. You need to be hopped up on a multitude of drugs and exhausted but unable to sleep thanks to one of the side effects of said drugs. (Thanks PREDNISONE you can suck it!) What's the quote you ask?
"I once thought I had mono for an entire year, it turned out I was just really bored."
For the last couple weeks I have NOT wanted to go to the gym. I've been fine seeing friends and working but my heart was not in it when it was time for stupid cardio. When I did go it was lackluster and while I was sweating a lot I'm now fairly certain that it was totally the humidity. I chalked it up to boredom and a little sadness cause my actual friends and gym friends had either left or changed schedules and I didn't know anyone except all the people I stare at and judge constantly. And they're fun for a while but again, I'm easily bored so the novelty didn't last.
It turns out I wasn't just bored. I have mono. Awesome. When I read up on it and the "incubation time" (that makes me want to watch some Aliens (GAME OVER MAN!)) before symptoms appear (in my case an insanely vengeful sore throat and swollen lymph nodes) is 6 weeks from exposure. I do believe that leaves me somewhere in the Alaskan wilderness. I did let my germophobe guard down while there: sharing glasses and the like. Hey, it was ALASKA! Oh well. I still stand by the fact that it was an amazing vacation, even if it did leave me with a severely painful and lasting impression. It could have been sweat at the gym or even that hobo I let cry in my mouth, but I guess we'll never really know for sure.
Side note: Because I like to research things, especially when they make me feel crap crap crappy, I learned that 90-95% of adults have been exposed to mono. So yay I'm in like the biggest, stupidest club on the planet now! And the best part? Epstein-Barr virus, the cause of infectious mononucleosis, is totally in the herpes family. So they're right: what happens in Alaska (or Vegas I guess) stays in Alaska. Except for herpes. That shit'll follow you home.
1 comment:
You could be a member of the 16 percent of Americans between the ages of 14 and 49 with genital herpes (http://www.reuters.com/article/2010/03/09/ps-herpes-usa-idUSN0923528620100309), or you could be a member of the (at least) 50 percent of sexually active people who get HPV at some point in their lives (http://www.cdc.gov/std/hpv/stdfact-hpv.htm). Luckily, you're not.
So, let me be your welcoming committee. Welcome to the Mono Club, ma’am! It’s an acceptable place to be.
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