In which NJ goes out in public

Part one.

There are quite a few reasons I don’t go out often. One could even say myriad reasons. But I won’t. I don’t want to sound pretentious. The problem used to be that I worked too much. I’d be at two jobs 60 hours a week or more and not have the energy to do anything else when my shifts were over. And all that working made me angry and bitter. Even more so than usual. And who wants to hang out with that? Then I quit one of those jobs and went back to school. So now I have work AND school as an excuse. The best part? I can use the "I'm a poor student" cop-out and it works every time.

I have been able to be out and about this past week (Spring Break ’09!) and hang out with people I actually like on the cheap. On Monday I hung out with my brother who’s home from school and watched the Blazer game at my favorite bar.

Side note: I’ve decided the Blazers lose whenever I watch the game, so I’m going to steer clear the rest of the season. (Except on Tuesday because I’ll actually be AT the game.) Once the regular season is done and if and when we get into the playoffs, that jinx is over and I'll watch every game.

Wednesday I got to see an old friend home for the week from NYC (hi Zack!) and Thursday was a fabulous night full of Star Wars, Deschutes Brown Ale, and boys way nerdier than me. But all of these nights out were in my comfort zone. Monday - George’s. The bartenders know my name and my drink. Wednesday - Lucky Lab. Lots of space not many people. Thursday - Chris’s house. Only people I know and feel comfortable around. Don’t get me wrong, I blend in with the normies well enough to avoid suspicion.

Occasionally I’m accidentally mean and more often than not I make a reference no one gets. But I’m okay with that, I’m over being embarrassed. I just feel bad for the people around me; they (usually) don’t deserve it.

I’m forgetful and klutzy. I say inappropriate things and make inappropriate noises. I hate small talk and stupid people, and more specifically small talk WITH stupid people. These are the general reasons home is safe and the outside world is scary.

Coming up: The specifics.